Saturday, May 29, 2010

Why I Talk About Sex

This is an explanation that technically should have gone out before I ever started making videos about sexuality. Please ignore my horrific grammar. I don't like to write by the rules unless it's for school lol.

So, why do I talk about sex? Am I just a sexual deviant taking cover on the internet? Or a pervert who just can't stop talking about it?

The reality is that I'm neither...well, maybe a little bit of the second one. To answer this question that I've gotten...hmmm, occasionally over the last few months, it's important to understand the type of person that I am. It is my belief that people should to live out their identities as organically as possible, with the ability to reach their full potential and personal reality without the impedement of various oppressors which try to restrict us. Some oppressors might be our social norms, religious tradition, familial expectation, or even internalized beliefs. A beautiful part of life is exploring and learning about who you are, and there are a lot of forces out there that try to tell us exactly what that is, or what we SHOULD be. I believe that you should have the freedom to be yourself, loveyourself, and live your life to the fullest.

I also like to help people. And...I'm not afraid to talk about taboo subjects. Many taboos are born out of those oppressors I was just talking about. Plus, I know a lot about sexuality. My curiosity has driven me to continually learn about it--sexuality is just so multi-dimensional and interdisciplinary--it's absolutely fascinating. From self study, to university study, to my own experience, to teaching peer sex ed to high schoolers and now leading the Female Sexuality course at my university in the fall. I figure, it's a perfect match.

Further, I see a lot of benefits in talking about sexuality. The most obvious being the hundreds of you who have written me lengthy letters of gratitude for my willingness to be upfront and provide you with resources you were afraid to or didn't know how to seek out yourself. Talking about sexuality also eases the taboo and helps shatter the ignorant idea that--"SEX IS BAD, MKAY" and that exploring your sexuality, or lack of it, makes you dirty. It's not something we should be afraid of--it's how we exist, how we keep existing, and something that millions of people are doing at any given second of the day. It is a part of relationships, it is a part of our health, it is a beautiful part of our nature. By talking about sexuality, we can slowly eliminate oppressive sex-negative attitudes so prevalent in our culture. Not to mention it opens avenues to increased learning, increased sexual responsibility and autonomy, and increased self-love.

The coin has two sides. I also love learning from you. Some of you already know this, but I read nearly every comment on my newest video for the first week it's out. I ask you questions because I sincerely want to know, and I love to get you thinking about it. I have taken away an abundance of knowledge and insight from everything you share in your comments and video responses.

So there you go. That's my philosophy at its simplest.